I had lunch yesterday with a friend of mine who brought along her really super super cute 2-year old boy. He was basically really good throughout the whole meal, but when things got sticky and borderline cranky I just kept passing the kid animal crackers. I mean I seriously had aboslutely *no idea* how to placate a bored 2-year old. The little guy ended up eating something like 15 animal crackers for lunch...he was pretty happy though! Given my own enjoyment of food we then had a rousing conversation of "Do you like...(insert food item here)." What else do you talk to a toddler about?
Then the subject came up of how to discipline children. My friend said the little guy had recently embarked on a hitting phase and that she had to turn to the trusty "Internets" to figure out what to do. I realized as we were talking about it that I too was at a loss for discipline tactics, namely since my best (and only) idea involves duct tape. I think if I were a parent I would probably get reported to CPS on a regular basis...there are just so many wonderful and necessary uses for duct tape. Is your child hitting people? Duct tape his little arms to his sides! Does your kid squirm to get out of his high chair? Duct tape him to the chair! Does he do that annoying "Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom" thing while you're talking to another adult? Duct tape his little mouth shut! I would be a horrible parent.
Hats off to all my friends who do it and make it look so easy. Your kiddos are lucky to have you (and not me) as their mother!
Signed,
Auntie Mo
1 comment:
I am SO with you. We just finished about 2 weeks of travelling with many shorties and I was totally fried by the end of it. I have no idea how parents handle kids on airplanes...or, in general, for that matter. Oh well. It's a dogs'/cats life for me.
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