Breaking out of Food Jail

Just recently I realized that I constantly, constantly think about food...when can I eat and what will it be? Once I've eaten I think constantly about what I just ate, fretting over it, worrying about it, obsessing with the guilt. Well I am sick to death of thinking about food all the time. Every time I go on 'a diet', all I think about is the next meal, the next snack, those extra 200 calories at the end of the day I've managed to snag by sweating my buns off at the gym. I'm sick of logging what I eat, tracking my calories, buying special "on-the-approved-list" foods...I am sick to death of it all.

So, I am officially breaking out of this prison of food obsession. I remember a time in the not so distant past when I didn't really think about food at all...when I was hungry, I ate something. When I wasn't hungry anymore, I stopped eating. I ate pretty much whatever I wanted, though this was when I was a pretty strict vegetarian so it was mainly healthy food. The great thing about being out of food jail at that time was that I was teeny tiny...well, teeny tiny for me...actually I looked darn good now that I think of it. Everytime I go on a special diet like Weight Watchers or South Beach or whatever, I always obsess to the point where food becomes the sole focus of my life. Bah humbug, I say!

Though I have only been out of food jail now for a few days I feel SO MUCH BETTER. So free...I am not beating myself up about every little thing. If I want some freakin' chocolate, I'm going to have a piece, enjoy the heck out of it and move on. I really feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders....aaaaaah, what a relief. I am reading a book called "How to Become Naturally Thin"...I'll let you know if there are any pearls of wisdom that must be shared.

So, that's the latest news...in other news I am sad to report that Truman doesn't seem to be feeling well right now. It may be the effects of the Leukaran, and I'm hoping once his bone marrow and white blood cell count recover in a couple of weeks or so he'll be back to his regular self. He did vomit a little blood this morning, but it was much less than a few days ago. Lets hope he doesn't have an ulcer...I cannot handle seeing him suffer. :-(

Thanks to everyone for their well-wishes on Mother's Day. I was mostly weepy the night before, but then was so busy preparing brunch for Tom's family that I didn't have time to sit around and feel sorry for myself. Stay tuned for pics...I may have outdone myself with this one. See my cute table???


Much love to all my peeps!
Mo